One Homely House

Why the homemaker’s role is vital to society

What’s the point of being a homemaker? Is it outdated? Does it even matter in the grand scheme of things?

Do you ever find yourself asking these questions? Maybe you compare yourself to others who have more illustrious occupations, or your former self before you adopted this role.

Perhaps you’re thinking about becoming a homemaker, but you’re leery of the social stigma or worried about degenerating into a vegetative state for lack of any intellectual stimulation.

Maybe you’ve been a homemaker for a while, and it’s beginning to feel pointless. Other people make comments about being a “productive member of society” or being successful in life, and you begin to feel like you have no place in the adult world.

To find the answer, let’s start by examining the meaning of work and the purpose of homemaking.

Work to live or Live to work?

What is the meaning of work? Is all work meaningful? These two questions are closely related, and very important to answer if you want to live with purpose.

Of course, you could write several books on the subject of meaningful work- and many people have. This brief overview just provides a framework for the question we are concerned with: whether or not the work of homemaking is meaningful.

Work can be defined in different ways, depending on your approach. Science, Philosophy, and Politics would each emphasize different aspects of it. For the sake of clarity, I am speaking of human work from a social and mildly philosophical standpoint.

Work, according to Joseph Pieper, is “that which gives man’s workday its name; it satisfies our basic needs and procures our daily bread; it constitutes the active effort to provide those things indispensable in order to stay alive.”

His definition emphasizes work as a means to a specific and measurable end: procuring a livelihood. If you isolate this statement, then work would be judged solely on the basis of money. The best work would be that which makes the most money.

But this goal of earning a livelihood is not the ultimate goal, and is not the only standard by which work should be judged. Pieper poses this question: “Can the human being be satisfied with being a functionary, a ‘worker’? Can human existence be fulfilled in being exclusively a work-a-day existence?”

A fully human life

Humans are rational beings, possessing intellects and wills. We can think and reason, imagine and make free choices. Animals, which live on an irrational and instinctual level of consciousness, can be satisfied with working to survive.

But humans need more than that to be truly satisfied. A fully human existence must challenge the intellect and engage the will, not merely provide for the physical needs of the body.

To be meaningful, then, work must support a truly human life. Work itself is not the end goal.

Some forms of work require more intellectual engagement than others, but even physical labor can be meaningful if it is directed toward supporting a fully human life.

The purpose of Homemaking

How do you define the purpose of homemaking? Well, what makes a good homemaker? One who accomplishes the most housework in a given amount of time? It’s one thing to make a list and check off as many tasks as you can, but that seems arbitrary and ultimately pointless.

If the goal of homemaking is merely to complete as much cooking and cleaning as possible every day, only to start over again the next day in an endless cycle of drudgery, that would be as mechanical and mindless as a career woman’s worst nightmare.

However, if the purpose of homemaking is to create a cheerful, welcoming home that is a haven for family and friends, then the individual tasks don’t seem distasteful anymore.

Working toward the goal

If you want your family to be able to relax and have fun together in your home, then you need to maintain some level of order and cleanliness.

Thus, cleaning the bathroom becomes less of a dreaded chore and more of a necessary means to the end that is a well-ordered home. When you think about it like this, each mundane task becomes an opportunity to love and serve your family.

It doesn’t matter that you will probably have to clean that very same bathroom hundreds or thousands of times over. You can still take delight in a job well done.

The purpose of homemaking is accomplished through love

Other tasks, like cooking, can even be raised to an art form. I’m not talking about gourmet cooking here, though there’s nothing wrong with that! Even small actions become works of art when they are done thoughtfully and out of love.

St. Francis of Assisi said, “He who works with his hands is a laborer. He who works with his hands and his head is a craftsman. He who works with his hands, head, and heart is an artist.”

What exactly does that mean? A laborer’s job takes physical strength and coordination. It doesn’t necessarily require much thinking, which is why people sometimes complain about “mindless work.” (Even if you think housework belongs in this category, keep reading!)

The next level, the craftsman, does require thinking. Animals can work together as laborers to build anthills or beehives, but they cannot think and reason as humans can. Craftsmen can take a piece of raw material and make it into something new. They can look at a problem and come up with a creative solution through reason and imagination.

Transcendentals

Artists go one step further. Their goal is not merely utilitarian: finding a solution to a problem, or material: making a useful object. Their goals have to do with transcendental attributes of being: the Good, the True, and the Beautiful.

Artists strive to reflect one or more of these ideals in their work, whichever medium they use. Philosophy and Law are ordered to Truth. Composing music, painting, and other forms of art reflect Beauty. Ethics and Medicine promote Goodness.

What does this have to do with scrubbing pots and sweeping the floor? It has to do with the end: the “Why” of the artist, laborer, or craftsman.

It’s not so much the subject of your work that defines which category you fall into. There are artists, craftsmen, and laborers working in all of the fields listed above, even though we would consider most of them professionals.

Don’t believe it? Here’s an example. I worked in a hospital for a time. Hospitals employ people to perform a wide range of jobs, from delivering trays of food to handling medical emergencies. I found people who loved the patients in every level of the medical hierarchy. It was also plain to see who was merely there for the paycheck.

Why do you show up for work? The answer to that question can mean the difference between a dissatisfied, empty life and one that is meaningful and fulfilling.

The transforming power of love

Can you imitate a Transcendental without pouring your heart into it? Does anyone win a marathon without pouring his or her heart into it? No–unless there aren’t any other fast runners!

But in all earnestness, no human creation can encompass a Transcendental. It will always be something above and beyond our best efforts, something we cannot quite capture. For this reason, they are sometimes called Perfections. Artists strive to capture some aspect of Goodness, Truth, or Beauty in their work, and they do this through love.

Love transforms our efforts, be they ever so mundane. Mother Teresa spent years taking care of dirty, sick, “useless” people. Bathing and feeding people doesn’t seem like art, but her love transformed her work into something beyond herself.

That’s part of the key. When something takes you out of yourself and makes you focus completely on another person, that’s love. Even if the work you have to do isn’t exciting. Even if the people you serve aren’t starving foreign children, but your own family members.

Mother Teresa said, “It is not the magnitude of our actions but the amount of love that is put into them that matters.”

If you wash the breakfast dishes with love, you’re an artist. If you fold the laundry with love, you’re an artist.

Love pays attention

Here is one my favorite quotes from one of my favorite novels. The author is describing the effects of learning not to rush through life.

When you slow down and pay attention to each separate task instead of cramming as much as you can into the day, a surprising thing happens. There’s still time for everything important, and you appreciate it more.

“Then the small things, the necessary things, even the ordinary, everyday things, especially those one performed with one’s hands–how mysterious that man could do such beautiful things with his hands–were revealed as works of art.”

The Awakening of Miss Prim, Natalia Sanmartin Fenollera

The amount of attention we give someone or something reflects how much we love them. If we always rush through our tasks, we can’t do them with love. Love stops and looks into the face of her beloved.

The role of homemaking in a truly human life

This brings us back to the original question of whether or not homemaking is meaningful work. We have defined meaningful work as that which supports a truly human life. The purpose of homemaking is to create a welcoming, loving home for your family.

The only question left to answer is whether or not the purpose of homemaking aligns with the goal of meaningful work. Is living as a family in a welcoming, loving home part of a truly human life?

For something to be considered truly human does not mean that every person who ever lived must have experienced it. A truly human life is the best life a human person could live, but not everyone does. Some don’t have the opportunity, and some who have the opportunity aren’t interested.

Homemaking supports a truly human life by providing the best environment for raising children.

Children need more than just food and shelter to learn and develop properly. Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs defines five different levels of human needs, starting with the basic physical requirements for survival and moving upwards through safety, love, esteem, and self-actualization.

Homemakers create stability by being present in the family home and keeping that home organized and running smoothly.

A stable family is a requirement for children to feel safety and security. A welcoming and loving family helps a child feel that he belongs and has value as a person. This in turn is the basis for self-esteem and the ability to pursue meaning and fulfillment in his own life.

Longitudinal studies have shown that when a child is born or adopted into a loving, stable family, he or she has the best chance of success academically and socially.

The absence of a stable home life often results in lack of self-esteem or poor adaptation skills. If a child doesn’t feel secure, how can he begin to determine his place in the world?

Homemaking strengthens the foundations of society

Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs doesn’t only apply to children. Every human person, regardless of age, must meet each level of needs in order to truly flourish.

Homemaking provides stability for every member of the family, fulfilling the second level: safety and security needs. A stable home might seem more important for children, but adults also need a solid foundation.

Life is unpredictable and full of changes: some positive, others negative. A person’s ability to adapt to changes depends heavily on their sense of security and stability.

In a broader sense, a society’s ability to adapt to changes or work together depends on its stability. When the ties that unite a nation begin to disintegrate, the nation weakens. It is easier for factions to divide the nation, or for a usurper to take control.

How do you determine a society’s stability? By its families. Families are the basic unit of society, from the earliest human records. Thus the health of a nation can be estimated by the health of its families.

If families are united, the communities will be stronger. If families are divided and isolated, communities become less cohesive and weaker.

Accomplishing the purpose of homemaking supports the family and society by creating stable homes in a changing world.

The ultimate purpose of homemaking

Do you still feel like your work at home doesn’t really matter? Do you compare yourself to others who seem to be helping many people in their jobs or volunteer positions?

One of my favorite quotes from Mother Teresa is, “If you want to see change in the world, go home and love your family.”

How true that is. If we don’t want to pour our hearts into loving our families, how will we love anyone else? And if we try to help others without really loving them, we won’t accomplish lasting changes.

On the contrary, if we start out by focusing on loving those we interact with every day, then our attitude of love will spread outward and affect anyone else we meet.

When you think about it this way, our world is in desperate need of loving homemakers. There is as much suffering as ever, and a lack of people who know how to love.

A family without love splinters into lonely fragments. A society without loving families becomes a group of isolated individuals that must substitute laws for personal responsibility and concern for the needs of others.

Love strengthens not only our families, but also our neighborhoods and communities. These, in turn, form the basis for a stable society.

By staying home and loving their families, homemakers really are making a difference in the world. Your work does matter. The love you show in your small actions has the power to extend beyond the walls of your house and shine a little more light into the world.

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